Is anyone else afraid? Does anyone else feel like they are just not enough?
I spent years and years and years feeling this way. I’ve driven away friends and family because I’m “too sensitive,” “too needy,” “too flighty.” My house isn’t clean enough, I work too much, I’m not a good wife. I suck with money, I eat like crap, I’ve started businesses that have failed because I just didn’t have what it took to make them succeed.
Or so I thought…
Sadly this was my perception of myself. These are truly things I believed about myself. These were the voices in my head.
They were wrong.
EVERY single thing I have thought about myself for so many years was wrong.
I used to worry so much about what other people were thinking of me that I actually believed all the things my mind was telling me they were saying. And most of them were not saying a thing. Many people … according to a survey I recently took … think I’m pretty amazing. Of course the only thing I asked in the survey was to point out my positive qualities. I didn’t ask people to point out my negative qualities for a couple reasons. A) I don’t think anyone I am friends with would hurt me by saying anything bad to my face or on social media 🙂 and B) I know what my negative qualities are. I know the things that are wrong with me. Most of them are mind blocks. Things I believed about myself that caused me to feel negatively about myself which just sort of grew into negative habits.
Do I know where they came from? Not really. Does it matter? Not really. What matters is I am busting through them and creating a greater version of me. I am learning new ways to view things, new ways to view myself.
We are energy. We create and give off energy. Positive or negative … it’s all energy.
Anyone who truly knows me, knows that I have been super sensitive my whole life. That I tend to take on the feelings of the people around me. If you are sad I am sad, if you are happy I am happy. It goes beyond the typical “oh I’m happy for you” or “oh I feel so bad for you” where people are just kind of glazing over the subject. I feel it deep to my core when you are happy or sad. I take it on, internalize it and it becomes mine to bear alongside you. What I didn’t understand was that I have control over it. I can let it run me … or I can use it to help you.
When you are able to shift your inner awareness to how you can serve others, and when you make this the central focus of your life, you will then be in a position to know true miracles in your progress toward prosperity. ~ Wayne Dyer
These words are so true for me. And this is why I am here … Building Butterflies